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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Finaly a list that tells it like it is....................

Ten Reasons Men Prefer Guns Over Women

#10. You can trade an old 44 for a new 22.

#9. You can keep one gun at home and have another for when
you're on the road.

#8. If you admire a friend's gun and tell him so, he will
probably let you try it out a few times.

#7. Your primary gun doesn't mind if you keep another gun for a backup.

#6. Your gun will stay with you even if you run out of ammo.

#5. A gun doesn't take up a lot of closet space.

#4. Guns function normally every day of the month.

#3. A gun doesn't ask , "Do these new grips make me look fat?"

#2. A gun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you use it.

And the number one reason a gun is favored over a woman....

#1. YOU CAN BUY A SILENCER FOR A GUN
 

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Former moderator, now just a regular old Dootalker
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4,570 Posts
Mamasled,
I just love your posts. You and your husband are like icons on here. So cute!!!

Thanks for making me laugh today. I need it!
 

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planes take off against the wind
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15,035 Posts
thats funny Mama - I never would have expected that from you... Papa maybe...

I think #s 10 and 9 might apply for a woman as well... (it just costs more...
)
 

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Premium Member
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7,279 Posts
mama, ever hear these? a little dated obviously....

RED SKELTON'S RECIPE FOR THE PERFECT MARRIAGE
>
> 1. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little
> beverage, good food and companionship.
> She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays.
>
> 2. We also sleep in separate beds.
> Hers is in California and mine is in Texas.
>
> 3. I take my wife everywhere.....
> but ! she keeps finding her way back.
>
> 4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary.
> "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said.
> So I suggested the kitchen.
>
> 5. We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
>
> 6. She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric
> bread maker.
> She said "There are too many gadgets and no place to sit
> down!"> ..
> So I bought her an electric chair.
>
> 7. My wife told me the car wasn't running well because there was
> water in the carburetor.
> I asked where the car was; she told me "In the lake."
>
> 8. She got a mud pack and looked great for two days.
> Then the mud fell off.
>
> 9. She ran after the garbage truck, yelling "Am I too late for
> the garbage?" ....
> The driver said "No, jump in!"
>
> 10. Remember: Marriage is the number one cause of divorce.
>
> 11. I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was
> Always.
>
> 12. I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months.
> I don't like to interrupt her.
>
> 13. The last fight was my fault though.
> My wife asked "What's on the TV?"
> I said "Dust!"
>
>
 

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planes take off against the wind
Joined
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15,035 Posts
Har dee har har... I miss some of those guys... Way better than the screaming and swearing you get now a days.
 

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And...here.....we.....go.......
Joined
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5,656 Posts
Superman said:
mama, ever hear these? a little dated obviously....

RED SKELTON'S RECIPE FOR THE PERFECT MARRIAGE
>
> 1. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little
> beverage, good food and companionship.
> She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays.
>
> 2. We also sleep in separate beds.
> Hers is in California and mine is in Texas.
>
> 3. I take my wife everywhere.....
> but ! she keeps finding her way back.
>
> 4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary.
> "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said.
> So I suggested the kitchen.
>
> 5. We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.
>
> 6. She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric
> bread maker.
> She said "There are too many gadgets and no place to sit
> down!"> ..
> So I bought her an electric chair.
>
> 7. My wife told me the car wasn't running well because there was
> water in the carburetor.
> I asked where the car was; she told me "In the lake."
>
> 8. She got a mud pack and looked great for two days.
> Then the mud fell off.
>
> 9. She ran after the garbage truck, yelling "Am I too late for
> the garbage?" ....
> The driver said "No, jump in!"
>
> 10. Remember: Marriage is the number one cause of divorce.
>
> 11. I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was
> Always.
>
> 12. I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months.
> I don't like to interrupt her.
>
> 13. The last fight was my fault though.
> My wife asked "What's on the TV?"
> I said "Dust!"
>
>

[snapback]690477[/snapback]​
You forgot one....
I don't know what to get my wife for our anniversary. She never used the coffin I got her last year.

Jerry
 
G

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zdooman said:
Har dee har har... I miss some of those guys... Way better than the screaming and swearing you get now a days.
[snapback]690569[/snapback]​
Red skeleton was good! and he did it without vulgarity!
 

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Good at wrecking stuff.
Joined
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5,634 Posts
Mama... you forgot one. Nobody will frown on you for keeping a woman in a locked case in the trunk of your vehicle.
 

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Registered
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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
zdooman said:
thats funny Mama - I never would have expected that from you... Papa maybe...

I think #s 10 and 9 might apply for a woman as well... (it just costs more...
)
[snapback]690388[/snapback]​
Why wouldn't you expect that from me???????

I have a great sense of humor!! I love a joke probably more than the next guy!!

I live my life laughing............LOTS!!!!

I just don't like fun being made at abusing women or Gay bashing!!!! I will hit the COMPLAIN BUTTON every time!!

Just for the record.........I would hate to be a man and be married to most women!

Women are the most complicated creatures on earth, trying to figure them out is next to impossible.....except for the women on DooTalk.....any man should count their lucky stars if they are married to one of these fine gals!!!!! banana_guy.gif
 

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planes take off against the wind
Joined
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15,035 Posts
MamaSled said:
Why wouldn't you expect that from me???????

I have a great sense of humor!! I love a joke probably more than the next guy!!

I live my life laughing............LOTS!!!!

I just don't like fun being made at abusing women or Gay bashing!!!! I will hit the COMPLAIN BUTTON every time!!

Just for the record.........I would hate to be a man and be married to most women!

Women are the most complicated creatures on earth, trying to figure them out is next to impossible.....except for the women on DooTalk.....any man should count their lucky stars if they are married to one of these fine gals!!!!! View attachment 45909
[snapback]690866[/snapback]​
Oh no - here we go again...


Mama - sorry - maybe I wasnt clear enough - I would have expected something poking fun at woman to come from Papa - not Mama. Its all good. It had NOTHING to do with our 'other' recent parlays.

Papa - give her a hug for me while you are counting stars and I go try to figure her and my wife out....
 
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