Gettin Ready for Winter

snow-is-king said:

Every morning on the way to work I have started to throw 5 $100.00 bills out the window

I'll be ready for winter in no time

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now there is a man who understands sledding...

How to get ready for the snowmobile season:

1. Go to your local snowmobile repair shop, smile and
give the first guy you see $200. This will get you used
to spending money there on a regular basis.

2.Remove the muffler from your lawnmower, place it in a metal
garbage can and start it up. Put your head in the can and have
someone close the lid.

3. Fill a 50-gallon barrel with sand. Lower it into a hole.
Now lift it out. If you can, add water to the sand and try
it again. Do this 5 times per day. This will get your back
in shape for those deep snow stucks.

4. Tie a rope to a heavy-duty spring. Pull the rope repeatedly
with each arm until the pain in your shoulders meets somewhere
in the middle of your back. This will get you in shape for
starting your bud's sled, that he conveniently forgot was out
of gas and didn't tell you. It's best to do this exercise while
someone is spraying starting fluid into your nose and eyes also.

5. Drink four ounces of cod liver oil mixed with a strong laxative.
Dress with long underwear, wool pants, snowmobile bibs, insulated
boots and heavy coat. Walk far into the woods without any paper
products and wait for a personal emergency.

6. Place your hands in a bucket of ice water for 20 minutes. Put the
carburetor from your lawn mower in the bottom of your deep freeze.
Now climb in the deep freeze, shut the lid and overhaul it while
holding a pen light in your mouth. This gets you prepared to work
on your sled in the freezing cold and black of night.
NOTE: Advanced riders do this with a leatherman tool.

7. Dress up in your new $350 snowmobile bibs. Pour 2 stroke oil down
the right leg, gasoline down the other and Peppermint Schnapps and
Beer all over the front. Fill your boots with ice cubes and ask your
wife or girlfriend to dance. This will prepare her for the stops at
the local bar after a ride.

8. Put on a Balaclava and a full-face helmet. Attempt to drink hot
chocolate through the opening. Advanced riders attempt this while
riding a lawn tractor in the nearest farmers field.

9. Find a place where you can pay $3.50 a gallon for regular gas;
$19.99 per quart of oil; $16 for a hamburger and frozen french fries;
$3 for a coke and $60 to sleep in a cold cabin on a bed with springs
sticking through the mattress. Stay for two nights, minimum. This
will prepare you on the high cost of your future winter trips.

10. Practice explaining to your banker why you need another loan
for a $40,000 truck to pull the four $10,000 toys in your $9,000
trailer that you still owe $40,000 on.

nice!

right on the money , funny post !

one important thing you've gotta keep in mind after reading such disheartening facts.... IT'S ALL WORTH IT

chromer_14 said:

one important thing you've gotta keep in mind after reading such disheartening facts.... IT'S ALL WORTH IT

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Yes it is

Great Thread!